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Game Store Scouting Mission: South Melbourne Market

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PostPosted: Wed Nov 25, 2015 6:55 am    Post subject: Game Store Scouting Mission: South Melbourne Market Reply with quote

Couple of coworkers and I went to the South Melbourne Market for burritos at lunch today. So we're sitting at a table near the edge of the market, talking, and one of them says "oh hey, my friend's friend is running one of your stores just around the corner, Tyler" Well, one of "my stores" turned out to be a gaming store. So I wandered over to take a look.

Now, first of all, the South Melbourne Market is not actually hell on earth, but it may be a prophetic vision of some kind of limbo or purgatory. A celestial waiting room where slightly annoyed lost souls wander for all time through crowded hallways between chaotically overstocked stores selling garbage. The stores are usually empty of customers, or might have one person trying to jam themselves sideways between shelves groaning with the weight of bullshit knicknacks, broken pet toys, stolen smartphones from a decade ago and magical healing crystals. Every shop has one person sitting next to an ancient cash register, looking bored out of their minds.

After a little while I became afraid that I had somehow passed through the looking glass. I worried that perhaps I would wander for centuries, always slightly baffled at where I was and slightly frustrated with whatever old woman was pushing her fucking pushcart full of fruit in front of me at 3 kilometres per month, blocking my way. Attempts to map the maze would be meaningless, as intersections shifted and moved, shops springing up or dissapearing whenever you turn your back. I became afraid that there was no day or night in that timeless, eternal place. I thought that maybe I would eventually give up on the exit and find a garbage store of my own, and thus become a part of the purgatorial landscape. And after a few centuries running a store I would return to wandering, but this time at peace with the fact that I would never leave. And only then, only then would the spirits of that place present me with an exit. And I would wander out blinking into the sunlight, into the outside world that I had half forgotten, and find that only a few minutes had passed in the outside world. And then my ancient body would crumble to dust.

But that didn't happen. After a few minutes I found the place. Medium size store, but looked bigger because it was really empty of stock. Some Star Wars Armada at too-high prices, and no idea from the cashier when the next wave of expansions was coming. Also sold some lego and board games. Not very impressive, altogether. And no customers.
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